Harvey Comics vs. DC Comics


Introduction

What would happen if the heroes of the Harvey Comics universe meet their equivalents in the DC universe?  That is the goal of this article.  The challenge is finding the Harvey Comic equivalent character in the very different DC universe.  Also, the Harvey Comic character deserves to meet the most famous equivalent character.  DC characters that had their own title are considered more important than characters that did not have their own title.  If more than one character type had their own title then the character that had more impact on the history of the DC universe is picked as the “adversary” for the Harvey character.

1) Archibald the Talking Wishing Well vs. Haunted Tank

Archibald the Talking Wishing Wellis a very, very minor character in the Harvey universe but I have a soft spot for sentient objects.  I even wrote a book on the subject called Household Fables.  Archibald the Talking Wishing Well is a supporting character in the Casper universe.  Hot Stuff’s trident is also sentient and capable of doing magic.  Unfortunately while the Casper universe is overrun with, one-shot, sentient objects this is really not something that is done in the DC universe.  However, there is the Haunted Tank which is a tank haunted by the ghost of Robert E. Lee and this is pretty much the foremost sentient object in the DC Universe and actually almost the only sentient object in the DC universe that is not a one-shot.

The Haunted Tank gets lost in a back story of Tales of the Unexpected, just before Lee’s fight with the other ghost Captain Fear, and finds himself in the Casper universe.  Archibald asks the Haunted Tank if he wants a wish.  Robert E. Lee wants his body back!  One can assume that Archibald can see and hear ghosts since Archibald communicates with Casper.  Archibald gives the transformation a try but just doesn’t have the juice for such a giant magical spell.  Lee starts to wheel himself back home but Archibald yells “stop”.

Archibald has been a sentient magical well for thousands of years and is sick of his existence.  Archibald gives and gives and sometimes doesn’t even get a thank you.  Archibald realizes that the Haunted Tank is the only being he has ever met in the Casper universe that has the guts to do what has to be down.  Archibald tells the Haunted Tank in piteous voice, “Please kill me!”  Lee understands the pain of the wishing well since he has been trapped in a similar manner.  Lee realizes that Archibald’s plight is far worse since it’s been his lot for thousands of years not just a little over a hundred.  At least the Haunted Tank has mobility and adventures.  Lee slowly lowers the turret of the Haunted Tank and blows the well to bits.

2) Baby Huey vs. Rubberduck

I have written about anthropomorphic animals before at:

https://foxhugh.wordpress.com/2009/06/10/dc-vs-marvel-funny-animals/

The anthropomorphic animals of DC include Alley-Kat-Abra, American Eagle, Bulldog Drumhead , Captain Carrot , Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew, Dodo and the Frog, Doodles Duck, Fastback, Flippity & Flop, J. Rufus Lion, Little Cheese, McSnurtle the Turtle, Nutsy Squirrel, Peter Panda, Peter Porkchops, Pig-Iron, Racoon Kids, Rubberduck, Tito and his Burrito , Three Mouseketeers, and Yankee Poodle

Baby Huey deserves to fight another anthropomorphic duck.  The foremost and actually only anthropomorphic duck of the DC universe is Rubberduck.  Rubberduck is a supporting character of a second tier title, Captain Carrot and the Amazing Zoo Crew.  Rubberduck was trying to visit Superman with his interdimensional vehicle but ended up in the Harvey universe instead.

Baby Huey thinks Rubberduck is so cute and tries to give him a big sloppy kiss.  Rubberduck mistakes this attempt at affection for an attack.  Baby Huey effectively has super strength and has been known to toss cars around.  Rubberduck can stretch his body like Mr. Fantastic or the Elongated Man.  Rubberduck wraps his body around Baby Huey and starts the big squeeze.  Baby Huey almost passes out but with one gigantic push of his arms manages to snap out of Rubberduck’s grip.  Baby Huey then whirls Rubberduck around and around by his legs and finally lets him go.  Rubberduck falls into a convenient lake unconscious.  Baby Huey jumps into the lake but remembers that he can’t swim.  Rubberduck drowns.  Baby Huey cries and cries until Papa Duck calms him down.

3) Casper vs. Spectre

DC doesn’t have that many ongoing ghost characters.  Ghosts in DC include: Dark Angel, Dead Boy Detectives, Deadman, Gentleman  Ghost, Haunted Tank, and the Spectre .  The Dead Boy Detectives, Deadman, Haunted Tank and the Spectre have all had their own title.  However, the Spectre has been around since the Golden Age and is generally considered the archetype of the ghostly superhero that abounded in the Golden Age.

Casper hears the meowing of the Phantom Zone Cats and follows the meowing to the Phantom Zone.  Casper is surrounded by evil Kryptonians that have been sentenced to the Phantom Zone.  The Kryptonians are mean and scary, far scarier than the Ghostly Trio, and Casper begins to cry.  The Spectre hears the crying of the ghost child and takes him by the hand and leads Casper back to his own universe.

4) Hot Stuff the Little Devil vs. Etrigan the Demon

The following is a list of demons in the DC universe:  Anton Arcane, Asmodel, Azazel (DC Comics), Belyllioth, Blaze and Satanus, Blue Devil, Chantinelle, Demons Three, Dreamslayer,Etrigan the Demon, First of the Fallen, Great Evil Beast, Heggra, Jeannette (comics), Lucifer (DC Comics), Mazikeen (comics), Mnemoth, Nebiros, Nekron, Neron, Onimar Synn, Raven (comics), Sabbac, Trigon (comics) and Yuga Khan.  Hot Stuff is technically a devil not a demon but these terms are interchangeable in the DC and Harvey universes unlike the Marvel and more especially the Dungeon and Dragon universe.  Hot Stuff should meet DC’s foremost demon since DC appears to avoid the appellation of devil, probably for religious reasons.

Only the Blue Devil, Etrigan the Demon and Lucifer had their own titles at one time or another.  The Blue Devil is an odd little second or even third tier character that is currently in comic book limbo.  Lucifer is one of the most powerful characters in the DC universe and could probably wipe out the entire Harvey universe without much trouble.  Poor Hot Stuff would be hopelessly over matched in a contest against Lucifer.  Therefore, Etrigan the Demon emerges as the champion of the DC universe.

Hot Stuff wanders away from Deviltown and encounters a section of hell he has never seen before.  Etrigan is considered one of the more powerful demons even in the much darker recesses of hell.  Etrigan is probably stronger than any demon in Deviltown.  Hot Stuff is a baby that wears asbestos diapers.  Hot Stuff takes one look at Etrigran and runs back to Deviltown.

5) Nightmare the Galloping Ghost (Casper’s horse) vs. Comet the Super-Horse

There are not a lot of important horses in the DC universe.  Bat Lash has a horse named DaisyVictory and Vanguard are flying horses used by the Shining Knight.  Comet the Super-Horse is Supergirl’s horse and the most famous DC horse and just about the only DC horse even hard core DC fans can name.  Comet was once a human but was turned into a horse and then a super-horse by Circe.  Circe is generally a bad witch but will do good deeds if a good looking blonde hunk is involved.  Comet has all the super powers of Superman and Supergirl but none of their weaknesses.  Comet is immune to Kryptonite and does not lose his powers under a red sun due to the magical rather than Kryptonian origin of his super powers.  A horse is stronger than a man and a super horse is stronger than Superman.  Superman alone can defeat Supergirl but Supergirl astride Comet can defeat Superman.  Super-Girl with Comet beating on Superman is more or less a story line in more than one Silver Age Superman family issue.  Krypto managed to survive the destruction of the Silver Age continuity by DC during the Crisis on Infinite Earthsbut Comet and all the other super pets  that included Streaky the Supercat and Beppo the Supermonkey did not so this adventure takes place in the Silver Age exclusively.  When is HeroClix going to create a Supergirl plus Comet miniature using their Brave and Bold combined hero system?

Casper has disappeared and Nightmare follows his astral trail to the Phantom Zone.  The Phantom Zone Cats telepathically tell that Casper was in the Phantom Zone but was led back home by the Spectre.  You can see the DC Earth easily from the Phantom Zone and Nightmare sees Comet.  Nightmare’s heart beats like her heart has never beat before.

Nightmare thinks, “That’s one fine stud!”

Nightmare descends from the Phantom Zone to the DC Earth and offers her haunches to Comet.  The two can communicate telepathically.  Comet once was a human but has been a horse for a very, very long time.  Normal horses are not as intelligent as Nightmare and break easily.  Nightmare’s fluffy mane is like nothing Comet has ever seen before.  Nightmare’s Disney style eyes give her an exotic look that Comet finds irresistible.

Nightmare and Comet begin a torrid love affair.  Will Nightmare ever return to Casper?  Will Casper care?  Will Supergirl become jealous of Nightmare?  Will Superman become jealous of Nightmare?  What will Lois Lane do?  What convoluted plan will Lex Luthor come up with in order to use Nightmare to destroy Superman?  How will the editors at DC transform Jimmy Olsen into a male version of Nightmare?  Will there be a Nightmare/Ace the Bat-Hound team up against a Comet/Krypto team up?  Stay tuned for another day in the lives of the Silver Age, Super Family.

6) Richie Rich vs. The Green Team: Boy Millionaires

The Green Team is a team of rich kid adventurers.  The entry fee for the club is a million dollars.  The Green Team hates Richie Rich!  They are millionaires while Richie Rich uses millions of dollars to make common place objects.  Richie Rich has slept on a sleeping bag of hundred dollar bills (Richie Rich Dollars and Cents #11).  Richie Rich exercises with a jumping rope made out of precious jewels (Richie Rich Dollars and Cents #23).  Richie Rich made a bridge of dollar bills (Richie Rich Dollars and Cents #30).  The list goes on and on.  The Green Team is in DC comic book limbo and in this state have metafictional awareness.  The Green Team is aware that they are a poor copy of Richie Rich.  They tried to bribe Animal Man (Animal Man #25) into getting them out of comic book limbo but failed.  If the Green Team ever escapes comic book limbo then Green Team plans to buy DC Comics and get Richie Rich to join their team as a butler that works for them!  Of course if they get out then their metafictional awareness will disappear.  The Green Team is aware of this and have tattooed directions on their bodies as to what to do in case they ever escape DC comic book limbo.  Where Harvey comic book characters go when their title and even their comic book company is gone is unknown.  Oh they end up on my blog!

7) Sad Sack vs. Sgt. Rock

I have written about comic book war heroes before at:

https://foxhugh.wordpress.com/2009/03/21/dc-vs-marvel-war-heroes/

The DC heroes include Blackhawk, Boy Commandos, Captain Storm, Creature Commandos, Enemy Ace, G.I. Robot, Gunner & Sarge, Haunted Tank, Hunter’s Hellcats, Johnny Cloud, the Losers, Mademoiselle Marie, Red, White and Blue and Sgt. Rock of Easy Company. Sad Sack is sadly assigned to Easy Company and has Sgt. Rock has his NCO.  Sgt. Rock takes one look at Sad Sack and knows what he has to do.  Sad Sack is put on point and taken out by a German sniper shortly afterwards.  Even two days later, no one in Easy Company even remembers Sad Sack.

8) Stumbo the Giant vs. Colossal Boy

Stumbo is a giant and logically should fight the foremost giant of the DC universe which is Colossal Boy.  Colossal Boy wanders through a dimensional rift and finds himself in Tiny Town, the home of Stumbo.  Stumbo has once against accidentally destroyed a house in Tiny Town.  Colossal Boy surveys the destruction and decided Stumbo is some sort of evil giant that likes to destroy houses of those smaller for fun.  Colossal Boy grows to the size of Stumbo and loses some self control because at that size his intellectual capacity is diminished.  Diminished capacity or not, Colossal Boy has had extensive Legion martial arts training plus years of fighting experience.  Stumbo almost never fights enemies and mostly has accidents in Tiny Town.  Colossal Boy starts the fight with quick Karate chop to the jugular followed by a Judo throw.  Once down, Colossal Boy get Stumbo in a neck choke and chokes him out.  The small natives start throwing rocks at Colossal Boy and he is confused.  Fortunately, Braniac 5 has found Colossal Boy and uses an interdimensional transporter ray to bring Colossal Boy back to the DC universe.

9) Wendy the Good Little Witch vs. Zatanna

Wendy deserves to fight the foremost witch of the DC universe.  There are a ton of witch choices in the DC Universe including: Alley-Kat-Abra, Amethyst, Princess of Gemworld, Circe (comics) , Dark Angel (DC Comics), La Encantadora, Enchantress (DC Comics), Glorith, Jinx (DC Comics), The Mad Mod Witch, Madame Xanadu, Madame Zodiac, Manitou Dawn, Lyta Milton, Morgaine le Fey (DC Comics), Queen of Fables, Raven (comics), Satan Girl, Silver Sorceress,Tala (comics), Titania (DC Comics), Traci Thirteen, Warlock’s Daughter, White Witch (comics), Witchfire (DC Comics), Yellow Peri, Zatanna, and Zealot (Wildstorm).

Only Madame Xanadu and Zatanna have had their own series.  Zatanna has been an important member of the Justice League of America.  Zatanna even appeared in the Superboy TV show Smallville!  Zatanna is also famous for her costume and especially her fish net stockings.  Zatanna wins the DC witch wars.

Wendy accidentally creates an interdimensional portal that takes her to the DC universe.  Wendy is flying around Gotham City with her broom and literally runs into Zatanna.  Wendy is used to ugly adult witches with green skin warts and ugly purple robes.  Wendy can magically sense that Zatanna is a witch like she is but the sort of witch she wants to be when she grows up.

Wendy, “You are beautiful”.

Zatanna responds in a maternal voice, “You are pretty cute yourself kid but do you mind if I give you some fashion advice?”

Wendy, “Please, please, please!”

Zatanna uses her magic to give Wendy a makeover.

Wendy is overjoyed.  Zatanna helps Wendy get home and promises to visit her someday.  Casper meets the new Wendy and feels a strange sickly sweet nausea that disturbs him to his astral core.  Suddenly Casper doesn’t feel so friendly towards anyone that looks at Wendy.  Casper has been lonely ever since Nightmare disappeared but this new Wendy more than makes up for the disappearance of Nightmare.

More comic book articles on this blog at:

https://foxhugh.com/?s=comic

 

Hugh Fox III - Carved

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