Tag Archives: DC vs. Valiant

DC vs. Valiant Universe 5: Eternal Warrior vs. Batman

The Eternal Warrior (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eternal_Warrior) is an immortal and DC has its version of an immortal warrior called appropriately the Immortal Man (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immortal_Man).  The problem is that Immortal Man was a third rate super hero that even die hard DC fans often forget.  You don’t pit third raters against Olympians.

 

The Eternal Warrior is an immortal but above all else is the foremost martial arts hero of the Valiant Universe.  The foremost martial arts hero of the DC universe is Batman.  After having kicked his brother’s butt (https://foxhugh.wordpress.com/2008/05/22/dc-vs-valiant-universe-1-archer-armstrong-vs-batman-robin/), the Eternal Warrior is ready for a fight with Batman.  Also, Batman and the Eternal Warrior are both strategic fighters so expect a lot of attacks and retreats and counter attacks.  Traps using the local terrain can be expected from both sides. 

 

Batman has his utility belt and a lot more toys.  The Eternal Warrior has just one toy and that is a leather jacket that has studs on one side for offense and metal plates on the other side for defense.  I like the jacket so much I got an imitation made in Thailand.  Let’s hope I never have to use it.  The Eternal Warrior is a master of every weapon and martial art of the last three thousand plus years. He does not carry toys because he has outgrown the need for them as would Batman if he was thousands of years old.  Batman once turned down a Green Lantern power ring in the Justice League International because he said it would slow him down.  The Eternal Warrior has carried this minimalism to the next level. 

 

Batman throws a batarang at the Eternal Warrior.  The Eternal warrior grabs a book from the pocket of his jacket and uses the book as a shield.  The Eternal Warrior then moves in on Batman and hits him repeatedly with the book until Batman is knocked out.  The Eternal Warrior had seen the Bourne Supremacy at a movie theater last week and like what he saw and has been itching for a chance to use those moves.  The Eternal Warrior is an old dog who can learn new tricks.  The Eternal Warrior wins because he knows what Batman is thinking and then some.

 

 

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DC vs. Valiant Universe 4: Dr. Mirage vs. Wildfire

Clash of the weirdo energy super heroes!  Dr. Mirage (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Life_of_Dr._Mirage) is made up of necromantic energy.  As I have stated in prior posts, the Valiant universe is more positivistic than the DC universe and basically Dr. Mirage is a ghost with a pseudo science explanation that is a little better than the one provided by Ghostbusters but not by much. 

 

In this version of science, Ghosts are made up of type of energy and all the energy logic we have in natural science applies to ghost energy variously called etheric, psychic or astral energy.  For the record, most traditional physicists hate this kind of New Age energy logic but what do they know?

 

Wildstorm (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wildfire_(comics)) is made up of antimatter energy, technically an exotic rather than weirdo energy.  DC has a plethora of beings made up of pure energy but most of them are made up of electricity which is a pretty mundane energy than an exotic/weirdo energy like antimatter.  How many electrical devices do you have in your house?  Plenty but unless you are an alien I doubt you have any devices powered by antimatter much less necromantic energy.  Even Superman went the electrical energy being route briefly (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Superman_Red). 

 

There are also beings made up of nuclear energy such as Firestorm and Valiant’s own Dr. Solar.  Nuclear energy beings are not as common as electrical energy beings but still more common than beings of stuff like necromantic energy or antimatter energy.  Anyway, the electricity in your house may ultimately be from nuclear energy making this type of energy mundane.

 

Wildstorm isn’t the only DC weirdo energy being.  Negative Man (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negative_Man) has a negative energy being inside of his regular body, host body, technically.  Negative energy fills the weirdo energy part since like necromantic energy I have no idea what negative energy really is but he isn’t a being of pure energy like Dr. Mirage and the Negative energy being can only exist for 60 seconds making him no match for Dr. Mirage. 

 

Being made of pure energy has many advantages regardless of if the energy is mundane, exotic or weird.  You don’t need to go to the bathroom, eat, sleep or even need oxygen and you are probably immortal but generally you don’t have a sex life either and that bother’s the like of Wildstorm.  The best of both worlds is being able to switch back and forth from having a regular body to having an energy body so you can have sex at home but turn into pure energy when needed as a crime fighter and some lucky DC beings can do this. 

 

Dr. Mirage blasts Wildstorm with necromantic energy and nothing happens.  Wildstorm blasts Dr. Mirage with anti-matter energy and nothing happens.  Turns out the two weirdo energies have no affect on each other whatsoever.  This is clearly explained in chapter 13 of the weirdo physics book but I guess these guys dont have that book.  Go ahead and ask your local high school teacher “what happens when you mix antimatter energy with necromantic energy?” and see what sort of answer you get.  This blog is becoming more and more popular so this situation may very well happen and I apologize to high school physics teachers all over the world ahead of time.  After an hour of this they get bored and decide to call it a draw and discuss what it’s like to be a being of pure energy or not.

 

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DC vs. Valiant Universe 3: Bloodshot vs. Cyborg

Bloodshot (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloodshot_%28comics%29) has nanites in his blood stream that give him enhanced strength, speed, healing and technopathy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_comic_book_superpowers#Technopathy). Bloodshot is a cyborg.  A cyborg is generally a human who has been enhanced through the addition of technology.  Some would argue that a person with heart pacer is a cyborg but no someone wearing glasses because the enhancement must be fairly permanent in nature.  Bloodshot does not look like a cyborg but like a vampire.  He has white skin, giant red circle in his chest and eyes lacking pupils.  Compared to his opponent, Bloodshot is a cyborg beauty queen.  Bloodshot also has some hard wired programming that allows him to fight in a super efficient manner.  Bloodshot does not have any built in weapons but generally carries firearms.

 

Cyborg (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyborg_(comics)) is also a cyborg but a more traditional cyborg.  Cyborg has big pieces of shiny metal stuck all over his body.  One of his eyes looks like a camera and kind of is a camera.  Cyborg looks like a cyborg and he does not like the way he looks.  Dad made Cyborg into a cyborg to save his son’s life.  Dad had never watched the Six Million Dollar man, yet another cyborg and had thought of making the prosthetics more cosmetically appealing by coating them with flesh colored plastic and using thinner pieces of metal.  This never occurs to Cyborg either and mostly he sulks about looking like a monster.  Cyborg has super strength as opposed to enhanced strength i.e. he is stronger than Blood Shot but not as fast and agile and all those big pieces of metal probably even slow him down a bit.  Cyborg has any number of built in weapons and gadgets unlike Bloodshot.  One of his many gadgets is a device that enables him to control most computer systems.  An old fashioned version of technopathy compared to Bloodshot’s.  Most of Cyborg is covered with promethium, an exotic metal.  Promethum is pretty much indestructible but Cyborgs human innards are still vulnerable.

 

Bloodshot and Cyborg are both shopping at Cyborg R US the trendy new chain of clothing stores for the burgeoning cyborg population.  Both spot a really cool limited edition T-Shirt by Polo.  The T-Shirt has “Cyborgs Make Better Lovers” as its motto.   This is the T-Shirt every upscale cyborg must have but there is only one left!  This is a limited edition T-Shirt and both parties realize there probably isn’t another one on sale anywhere.  Cyborg needs every fashion break he can get and really hates how the fact that Bloodshot is a cyborg and actually looks pretty cool rather than looking like a monster.  Bloodshot is actually a better lover since becoming a cyborg since the nanites give him enhanced stamina and control of every part of his body.  Cyborg hasn’t had any good loving since becoming a cyborg despite having a gadget just for such a purpose.  Bloodshot does not care for Cyborg’s hostile attitude.  After some arguing and attempts to use their technopathy on each other, which fails, they square off to fight for the T-Shirt.

 

Bloodshot is more agile than Cyborg and gets the first shot.  Blooshot shoots Cyborg with a machine gun but the bullets just bounce off Cyborg’s promethium.  Cyborg then aims his sonic scrambler at Bloodshot and stuns Bloodshot.  A normal person would have been knocked out but Bloodshot has enhanced regeneration.  The sonic scrambler affects everything in front of it so there is not much in the way of aiming or much possibility of dodging the beam. 

 

Bloodshot could have leapt over Cyborg and hit Cyborg from behind but Bloodshot is not that sort of fighter.  This is despite probably having the ability to pull of this move.  If I had enhanced strength and agility this would be my standard move since it routinely gets you out of the way of whatever they can toss at you and gets you behind them.  Basically apply dog fight logic to hand to hand combat.

 

Cyborg closes in a punches Bloodshot.  In theory a punch from the likes of someone with super strength should take the head right off of someone lacking Superman style invulnerablity as is the case with Bloodshot but this never happens in comic books since this would upset the six children that still read comic books.  Bloodshot is conked out and Cyborg wins!

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DC vs. Valiant Universe Overview – 0

I probably own every issue of the short lived Valiant Universe (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valiant_Comics) and in my view the demise of this line was a sad day in comic book history.  The Valiant line was conscious attempt to make a better super hero for reasons I will outline in the introduction.

 

One way to arrange comic book universe battles is to match up opponents that are more less doppelgangers of each other.  This is what happened in the DC vs. Marvel miniseries (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DC_vs._Marvel)

that matched up such doppelgangers as Aquaman (DC) and Namor the Submariner (Marvel). The advantages of the doppelganger approach are many.  The main one is you get contests between more or less equal heroes.  Secondly, you can keep a score card.  Maybe universe X has the strongest hero but Universe Y has the fastest one.  DC may have more heavy hitters in the area of magic but Marvel has more heavy hitters in the area of the power cosmic.  You put the top mage of the DC Universe, Mordru, against the top mage in the Marvel universe, Dr. Strange, and of course Mordru wins but in another category such as the power cosmic, DC wins. The Silver Surfer, for example, easily defeats the Black Racer.  I did not apply the doppelganger approach to my earlier D&D vs. Marvel post and am trying to do this with a future post, DC vs. D&D. 

 

I have tried to apply this logic to the DC vs. Valiant post as much as possible.  The problem is that many of the DC characters were created in simpler times when the one gimmick rule applied.  The Flash was the fast guy.  Green Lantern had a power ring.  If they had any other talents or weapons then this never came up.  Thanks to Stan Lee (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stan_lee), at Marvel, heroes starting having something resembling characterization and DC followed suit but not to the same degree as Marvel. 

 

This use of characterization meant that psychological stuff could impact the fight not just their super powers.  This so called Marvel Revolution started with the Fantastic Four.  The Thing (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thing_%28comics%29), of the Fantastic Four, is not as strong as the Hulk or Thor but he is a disciplined fighter.  When the Champion (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Champion_of_the_Universe), an Elder of the Universe, challenges the “strongest” heroes of the Marvel universe to a boxing match, the Thing wins not the Hulk or Thor.  The Thing wins because he follows boxing protocol.  The Hulk just goes nuts and is dismissed from the ring.  Thor pulls out his hammer and is also dismissed for breaking the rules.  In Secret Wars II (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secret_Wars_II), the Thing single handily stops and army of evil doers from touching the Beyonder through sheer will power rather than strength.  Ben Grim, the alter-ego of the Thing is a tough New York from the wrong side of the tracks who never gives up.  Daredevil (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daredevil_%28Marvel_Comics%29) has gone up against the likes of the Hulk and Namor and his determination to keep fighting to the end have enabled him to achieve pyrrhic victories against both these Marvel powerhouses.

 

Later still, heroes started carrying weapons!  This makes total sense to me.  If I was the Green Lantern I would still carry a 45 to shoot those giant yellow eagles that seem to be all over the place when you are a Green Lantern.  The Green Lantern ring is helpless against yellow colored objects.  Interestingly 45’s don’t share this weakness.  Green Lantern could have just plugged any number of yellow colored menaces during his career.  Better yet why not get one of those nifty utility belts from my buddy Batman?  If I was the Flash I would definitely grab some shrunken and knifes that I could hurtle at super speed like the Whirlwind, of the Marvel universe, eventually did.  Ok the Flash is a good guy and can’t use bladed weapons that kill but how about rubber balls that he throws at varying levels of super speed for different levels of lethality?

 

The Valiant universe is a later more complex universe than DC and Marvel and this complexity makes doppelgangers harder to find than between DC and Marvel.  The Batman aversion to guns, a prime example of the weapon monomania that plagues comic books, does not exist in the Valiant universe.  Most of the Valiant heroes will grab and use weapons as opportunity allows.  Being a martial arts enthusiast and big fan of weapons of opportunity I like this characteristic of the Valiant universe.  The X-O Manowar, a Valiant hero for whom a post will be written, is a barbarian that understands swords and does not fully understand super armor, when abducted by Aliens, but understands a weapon is a weapon and you might as well grab a good one when you can. 

 

Also, I have noticed that Valiant heroes, inherited from the Gold Key Comics (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gold_Key_Comics)

line, often have a category of villain they go after rather than just fighting bad guys in general and this is characteristic is hard to match in the DC or Marvel universe. There will be 22 posts in this series including this one. In comic books there is a fashion to start a series with zero rather than #1 and I like to be fashionable.  Anyway, this is the numbering system of the major arcana of the Tarot and therefore good enough for me.

 

 

The Valiant heroes covered in the series will include:

1) Archer & Armstrong (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archer_and_Armstrong)

2) Armorines (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armorines)

3) Bloodshot (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloodshot_%28comics%29)

4) Dr. Mirage (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Life_of_Dr._Mirage)

5) Eternal Warrior (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eternal_Warrior)

6) Geomancer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clay_McHenry_%28Valiant_Comics%29)

7) H.A.R.D. Corps (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H.A.R.D._Corps)

8) Harbinger (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harbinger_%28comics%29)

9) Magnus, Robot Figher (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnus,_Robot_Fighter)

10) Ninjak (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ninjak)

11) Outcast (http://www.valiantentertainment.com/wiki/index.php/The_Outcast)

12) Psi Lords (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psi_Lords)

13) PunX (http://www.valiantentertainment.com/wiki/index.php/PunX)

14) Rai (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rai_%28comics%29)

15) Secret Weapons (http://www.valiantentertainment.com/wiki/index.php/Secret_Weapons)

16) Shadowman (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shadowman_%28comics%29)

17) Solar (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solar_%28comics%29)

18) Timewalker (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timewalker)

19) Turok (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turok),

20) Visitor (http://www.valiantentertainment.com/wiki/index.php/The_Visitor)

21) X-O Manowar( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/X-O_Manowar)   

 

I have about 100 plus “What if fights” planned for this blog so stay tuned. We have to assume that for these fights to even happen both fighters live in a common universe.  Anyway this is the assumption I will make in all “What if fights” since the whole how they meet thing is repetitive and tiresome.  The same assumption will be used in the “What if dates” post the second major category of this blog site.

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